Do we ever truly break-up with people?
Break-ups are never easy and sometimes they can become messy. It's hard to move on from someone you cared for so deeply. One day you are working on fixing your relationship to the following night he is holding you while telling you that he can't do this anymore.
It's hard and devastating because you begin to question yourself, wondering if you are the reason the relationship went from good to bad within 24 hours.
We continue to stay their Snapchat buddies and Facebook friends, but the position has completely changed. You go from being that person who knew their dreams and desires then suddenly you are the person on the outside looking in on their lives. It becomes rough because the conversations just seem to stop. Like you aren't welcome in their lives anymore. I've only been in a handful of break-ups and I can't begin to tell you how painful they were. It was like my heart had been either ripped from my chest of it had crumbled into tiny pieces.
It's hard to recover from these break-ups but it is possible. It will take time. Sometimes the recovery process can be quick or slow, depending on how you want to take it, step by step. I want to share with you how I learned from these previous relationships and how you can grow from the pain.
Try Not To Contact Him
I know that is easier said than done. Believe me. I struggle with this so much. After the break-up, give yourself time to recover. Don't try to contact him through text or social media. Just don't do it. Instead, give yourself time to heal and recover. Go spend time with your family or friends, do the things that made you happy before. You have to allow yourself that time to heal and reflect on the relationship as a whole. You need to be okay with yourself and love yourself before trying to find love somewhere else.
I know it can be hard because when you were dating, that person was your best friend. You shared yourself with that person and let them know every inch of you. It's hard to let that go. You have to remind yourself how that person isn't your person anymore. Your relationship has taken a change, and you have to accept that. Trying to contact him won't do anything except hurt yourself more.
Find Yourself Again
Sometimes it is hard being a girl who wants a relationship. To be able to share our feelings, passions, and the unconditional love that we have in our hearts. Being single can be hard, but it is during this time that you rediscover who you are.
Being able to find yourself after a break-up is a huge step in the process of moving on. It's not easy and it can be painful, but you have to take that step. Otherwise you will just be in that stage of wonder how you can fix the relationship that your ex left.
Sometimes when your partner leaves, that opens the door to finding who you are and what pieces of yourself you lost during the relationship.
Like Selena Gomez says in her song, "I needed to lose you to love me."
Sometimes when we lose the person we thought we loved, we find ourselves and that makes us stronger than anything else.
Like I said before, break-ups suck. They are one of the worse things to go through because you deal with the pain and heartache of losing someone that you cared for. You are going to cry, you are going to try and get your significant other back (I say that because I have done it before several times) but at the end of this sadness there is a light.
You will come out of this a new person and feeling stronger than you did before. You just have to give yourself that time and space to adjust and then grow. I know you will be able to get through this friend, just need to have faith in yourself.